What if the Here and Now Stinks?

     We hear it often, the past is over, the future isn’t here yet, enjoy now, stay in the moment, be mindful of the here and now.  But what if the here and now stinks?  What if you hate where you are right now and the only thing that gets you through the day is knowing that someday, hopefully soon, things will get better?

I love the idea behind the “It Gets Better” video campaigns aimed at helping LGBTQ teens.  The videos feature short segments featuring celebrities, influential people and other LGBTQ adults, telling our youth that they know how hard it is now.  They have been there and they have come through it and now experience happiness and success in their lives.  Their message is, “Hang in there.  It gets better.”

I think we all go through times in our lives when we could benefit from this message.  We all sometimes need to hear that it will get better.  But instead we are often told to stay where we are, to live in the moment.

I understand where this message comes from and realize at times we may need to stay with the pain to alleviate it or stay in the moment to appreciate it.  I have certainly been guilty of not appreciating moments in my life, only to realize they were over and I failed to hold on to them and enjoy them as I wish I had.  Because of this, I have learned to stay in the moment, when the moment is good.  But who wants to stick around when the going gets tough?  Why would I want to stay in a place that is painful and depressing?  I don’t.  I want to plan my escape.

It is at these times when it’s okay to revisit the past.  We need to remember how we’ve overcome previous obstacles to get to a better future.  We need to learn from our mistakes and our successes.  Our past does have value and purpose, we just need to be sure we allow it to be valuable and purposeful.  It’s okay to plan for the future as well.  It is often this planning that gives us hope and the power to get up each morning and continue on.

As Sigourney Weaver says in the television series, Political Animals, on the USA network,  “Most of life is hell: Dreams don’t work out, hearts get broken, people let you down, but you won’t get to the next great moment if you don’t keep going. So that’s what I do. I keep going.”  That’s what we all need to do during those rough patches – we need to keep going.  And the best way to keep going is to have a plan, a goal, a road map, so we know where we are going.  We need to go forward and with purpose.  That is how we get through those rough patches, those times when we simply cannot bear to stay in the here and now.  When we get to that next great moment, which we will, that’s when we can bask in the glory, stay in the moment, and enjoy the here and now.